Afro Hair Acceptance & Authenticity
A journey of self discovery with Keris Ellington-Brown
I had the pleasure of catching up with Indoor Cycle Queen, Boxing coach and all round Fitness inspo, Keris. In her interview, we talked mental health, race, hair appreciation and self-discovery.
Keris graduated from University with a degree in Marketing and Advertising went on to pursue a career in property. She was not interested in sport and going to the gym didn’t appeal to her at all. In University, she was teetotal, which is an achievement in itself when in UK student culture. However, it was after University when she entered her corporate role that the drinking culture sucked her in. As a result, Keris’ weight began to fluctuate and it could be said that she wasn’t really taking care of herself. She decided to commit to visiting the gym instead of the Pub with her colleagues and so her journey into fitness began, somewhat begain. It was only upon meeting Anthony, her long-term partner and avid gym-goer, that Keris felt motivated to take fitness seriously. In the habit of working up a sweat in the gym, Keris soon noticed that her corporate role wasn’t getting her heart racing in the same way.
‘Corporate wasn’t Keris. The job just wasn’t fulfilling. I was putting energy into things that didn’t make me happy, and that can never reward you back’.
During this period of simmering dissatisfaction, Keris’ boyfriend began to work at Psycle and so Keris began riding studio classes as a participant in February of 2016 and immediately fell in love with it. Still facing uncertainty regarding her future, Keris attended the ‘Quarter Life Crisis Project’; a yoga retreat experience that would become the catalyst for Keris’ transition into the Fitness Industry.
‘It was essentially a life intervention, it uncleared a lot for me and pretty much changed my life. It made me think a lot about what I didn’t want to do. I didn’t know what I wanted to do but I kept thinking about Ride and I remember saying: ‘I think I want to do that, I think I can do this’.
Inspired by the retreat, Keris took the leap by quitting her job and entering the academy audition. Keris found the physical demands of talking whilst cycling tough. Not only this, in the process of applying, Keris experienced a depressive episode and was signed off from her corporate role. Inspiringly, Keris was very open and honest about her mental health journey during her Psycle academy, bravely accepting her vulnerability, standing in the raw reality of her mental health and making the decision to continue pursuing her goals anyway. It’s this unwillingness to be held back and to let fear win that has afforded Keris many of her opportunities today.
Pushing through the Academy was a challenge that Keris dedicated herself to fully. She recognised that she had a lot of work to put in and fell short during her first assessment. The pressure was on at this point. By now, Keris had quit her corporate job and felt there was no other option but to dust herself off, and get that Pass. There was no going back.
‘I decided I was going to be an instructor, I didn’t have a backup plan. I was going to get on that timetable’
And she did.
Three productive years later, Keris now teaches permanently at a studio in Central London.
She explains:
‘Although, it’s cool to be Black and a Black woman, and socialising with us makes you ‘down’, socially and systemically there are still ideologies that exists within some people that can make walking into a studio as a Black Woman and a leader, hard. Sometimes, leading a room of people that don’t necessarily look like you or come from the same background as you, is hard. You have to work extra hard but you also have to remember who you are and why you’re there. You’ve got to own it. You’ve got to own you’
This honest account resonates with the experience of myself and other Black people in the industry. It’s important we acknowledge our vulnerability and prioritise our self-confidence, self-esteem and self-love in order to overcome these concerns and be our best selves during class.
Keris explains that her class style, music choice and image have developed drastically throughout her career. As a Black instructor, its common to have Imposter Syndrome when in a white-dominated industry. Sometimes this can naturally persuade you to play music or dress in a way that doesn’t feel authentic to you, because that’s ‘what the others do’ or what you believe others will enjoy. Keris certainly felt the silent pressure to ‘fit-in’, but through experience and self-growth, Keris now plays the music she enjoys and carries herself the way she wishes, particularly when it comes to her natural hair.
In her corporate role, Keris always relaxed her hair (permanently altered her hair texture with chemicals). After leaving her corporate job and attending the Quarter-Life Crisis Project, Keris was ready to evolve. As Coco Chanel famously put it:
‘A woman who cuts her hair is ready to change her life’.
And Keris was. She made the decision to transition to her natural hair in May 2018 whilst teaching and began embracing her natural afro texture. She would receive inquisitive and invasive questions and comments about her natural hair, like many mixed/Black people do, but wore her natural hair regardless. She began a routine of wearing her hair up whilst teaching, for practicality’s sake, but walking in and out with it down, symbolising her acceptance of her authenticity and identity.
Keris is proud of her hair as she’s realised that it’s part of the joy of being a Black woman. It’s texture, colour, versatility and variety is something to be thankful for. But in the society that we live in and the beauty ideals we’re conditioned to accept, often its less than easy to believe in the beauty of Black hair. The hashtag ‘Black Girl Magic (BGM) is a movement that among other things, encourages BME women to challenge negative attitudes towards their hair and to wear their natural hair like a crown. This is something Keris embraced.
Keris sees her position on the Ride podium as more than a job role, it’s an opportunity to make a statement and to showcase Blackness and Black beauty.
‘We’re not here to live a basic life, we’re here to do more’
Through fitness, Keris is able to challenge the status quo and make a difference. Looking back, Keris sees herself as a more confident and more authentic woman than the Keris of three years ago.
‘I’m who I was deep down all along and my hair is a massive part of that reality. Fitness is about striving to be better and do more, but it’s also about learning to be who you’re meant to be without all the social conditioning. Fitness has allowed me to be undiluted. I am still exploring race within fitness. It’s definitely a process. Cutting my hair off was the start of something new for me’.
What Keris encapsulates is the strength and boldness necessary to stand in your true reality, embrace your identity and simply Be.
Keris uses her journey of self-discovery, her experience and her appreciation for Black hair to inspire her Riders and those around her to accept and express their true selves. As Keris states, becoming who you’re meant to be is a process of self-reflection, evaluation, reassessment and readjustment. For Keris, that journey began in the cycling studio, and three years later, every week Keris wakes up at 5am to inspire others to begin their own journey.
You can find Keris at @misskeris on Instagram and at Psycle and Third Space, London.
